2014 was a very enlightening year for me. It started out with me being hurt and very confused. When I thought about it trying to make sense of everything that was happening I realized that this was no different from any other year that had passed. It was the same I was hurt and upset over something and that no matter what I would do it would always end up with the same result. Me being hurt and confused. I made the decision in 2014 to make a change I realized that I had to choose my battles and I had to choose them wisely. I realized that you can love someone but unless they love you it is a wasted effort you will always end up hurt and yes confused. Love should be a two way street if it is not then someone is going to end up hurt and just for the record LOVE is ALOT more than just saying I love you.... Love is being there for each other, praying for each other, worrying about each other and loving each other no matter if you see eye to eye on the same things or not. SO on this note I decided to step back and just see who truly loved me and who had my best interest at heart. It did not take me long to realize this. SO it is these people that love me just as much as I love them. They love me when I am up and they love me when I am down. When I am down they always know what to do to uplift me.... They know who has my heart and they would not dare do anything to hurt me or the ones that I hold so dearly. They are a positive influence not a negative. It was hard for me to accept these things but I did with the help of Jesus Christ. You see you accept from others what you think you deserve and evidently I thought I did not deserve very much. Because I sure took a lot and how I even could hold my head up and smile it had to be with the help and grace of God. Since making this decision in 2014 I have lost some people from my life but I have also gained some.... I have prayed many hours over this and I believe that God does not expect you to be in a toxic, one sided relationship with anyone. God wants you to be with people that lift you up. People that are proud of you.... proud to be around you... they want the best for you and wont let you settle for anything less. (This goes for friends and family.)
A true friend is loving—not with a selfish type of love, but with the kind that puts others’ needs first. There is a well-known chapter in the Bible about what real love is. It says, “Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” (1 Corinthians13:4-7).
A true friend will not try to lead you to do things that are wrong or hurtful, but rather is there to support you and encourage you to make right, healthy and proper choices in your life (Proverbs 1:10-14; Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).
There are many scriptures in the bible that tell you just what a friend is.... so with much prayer and reading I am finally at peace with my decision. SO for this brand new beautiful year of 2015 with the help of Jesus Christ I can see things only getting better and better for me and the ones I hold so dear in my life. Once you start realizing your worth you will not be able to accept anything less from anyone else. It is a good feeling. One I had not felt in a while. I feel as though I am actually standing up for something.... that being myself. I hope everyone has a AMAZING New Year and God Bless YOU ALL!♥
